+hough+s

I was walking down the road when big droplets of water came falling down..

I was hoping for a downpour.. to wake me up from this stupidness of mine.. but the rain juz simply refuses to come…

I thought I have succeeded.. but deep down inside,, I knew I have not..

u asked me if I m alright.. I told u yes.. but I’m sorry cass.. actually I m not.. but I really din cry..

I’m just deceiving myself ba..

is it really so easy to let go?

is it really so easy to treat it as history??

is it really so easy to juz forget everything???

i noe it is either a want or a dun want.. it’s a choice I have to make for myself.. many times,, I had said,, I can.. but y is it tat today,, I juz suddenly have the feeling tat I m deceiving myself??

i dun wan to deceive myself anymore..

i dun wan to keep thinking about it anymore..

i dun wan to keep…………………

towards a breakup,, maybe being harsh is good.. maybe being firm on the decisions made is good.. but cant one juz reconsider first b4 giving the second or third ans?

never in my life do I hope to be deceived.. but.. I hope tat u had lied to me n let this keep on gg till after the Os.. reason being,, then I will have more time to react..

to everyone: I’m sorry.. but.. juz let me blog out my feelings ba.. this is the worst stage tat I will be.. so u need not worry..

I was hoping to wake myself up from the walk home.. but I realized tat it had made me know better how I was actually feeling… I want to overcome it.. I want.. but.. really.. it’s difficult..

u have tried ur best in waking me up le.. u have done ur best le to help me le.. it’s juz me myself who dun wish to wake up from the dream n overcome the nightmare..

i kept asking myself whether there will be another chance… I noe after reading this line,, many of u will be saying tat i m stupid,, I shouldn’t have thought of it,, I shouldn’t have let myself be so upset n I shouldn’t wait anymore.. but.. I really hope there will be another chance..

i noe it’s impossible.. I knew the ans.. I knew the outcome.. I know everything.. I know wat I should do..

can someone juz tell me all the negative side of this?? to make me want to forget it?? to make me … ?

i seriously feel tat being frens might be a better choice… but.. it’s juz this dunno wat feeling tat caught hold of me each time..

i m contradicting…………….